My Guardian Angel is Working Overtime

(wrote this this afternoon on the train in a word document. now copy and pasting for your enjoyment)

I feel so blessed. Just in the past 14 or so hours, there have been so many potential really unfortunate events. . . I guess by "so many" I really mean "2".

If you're a loyal reader (how funny that I have "loyal readers"), you already know about my purse being stollen. That could have been really much worse, in so many ways. It could have been violent or traumatizing. I could have tried to fight back and ended up hurt (don't worry, I know that's not what you're supposed to do. You throw the purse and run the other way). They could have taken things that are difficult to replace. But my credit cards, passport, and EuRail pass are all safe. I could have had just one journal instead of two. They way it went, they only got from Rome to Nice. I hope they read it and enjoy it and enjoy it. And then send it back. My email address is in it, along with Stuart's (old) address and I think Dado's too. If they every want to take a really cool trip, all the info is in there: train times and routes, hostels, phone numbers, restaurants, whatever. Plus now I get to buy a new journal, which is good. How else could it have been worse. . .the glasses in the purse could have ben prescription instead of just normal, cheap sunglasses. That would have been a bother. My camera could have had a full memory card that I had never emptied, but as is, I just lost like five pictures of Nice. It could have been my cool, red Italian purse instead of my old, brown Goodwill purse. Oh! And it could have had my iPhone that I was considering bringing with me, instead of a crap little piece of plastic with like 4 more prepaid euros on it. It could have gotten stolen during something that wasn't worth it, like if I had accidentally fallen asleep on a park bench or someting. (Not that I do that - they don't have motors). But as is, I had a really great night last night. And sure, next time I'm sitting on the beach enjoying delicious pizza and lovely company, I'll remember to put my purse around my shoulder instead of set it next to me (seems like a no brainer), sometimes you forget things. And I'm just so thankful that it ended as good as it did!!!

(short break, and then I'll tell you about my current near-disaster).

Okay, back. Ha! You didn't even notice I was gone, did you? I'm that fast. So currently, I am sitting on a very delayed train that will continue to be delayed for a very long time. Let me tell you why that's a blessing: the train I'm on delayed because up ahead a train had a very large accident. How blessed I am to be on the one that's only delayed. Announcements I don't understand keep coming on, and everyone keeps sighing. I imagine they keep adding time to how long we'll be delayed. But I'd rather be eventually on my way to Barcelona than immediately on my way to the hospital. . . or the morgue. Wouldn't you? (Sorry, the morgue comment was very macabre and I'm sure not appreciated by my mom. Sorry Mom!). Anyways, there are so many things to be thankful for in this situation, and I'm feeling rather lucky. Besides being on the train that crashed, I could be the mom behind me responsible for the crying child, but I'm not. So I don't need to worry about that one. I could be waiting for a train that isn't even here yet, which would mean that I would have to wait in the hot hot outside or the hot hot station, instead of in here in my comfy, air conditioned trian car. The train could be a regional, unairconditioned, crowded train. Instead, it's an IC (itnercountry?) train that is basically occupied by me and some French military guys (and the crying baby & mom). I have five seats to myself, my feet are up, I have comfy pants on, and the train security (maybe?) are passing out free water. Free water! Plus, it gave me the time to run inside and buy a new journal. It's bigger than the one I was using before, but we'll see how it goes. If I don't end up liking it, I'll just write a lot very quickly and move on. Oh! And since the trian isn't moving, I'm awake! Which means I have time to write this blog and hopefully re-write parts of the journal that I lost. And I'm so thankful that I'm not headed to a plane or something. I'll probably miss the rest of my 3 connecting trains to Barcelona, but (thanks to my EuRail!), all I lose is my 26 euro seat reservations and my 5 euro deposit for the hostel tonight. Not a big deal. I'm considering going into the trainstation and buying that waterproof camera I saw, but it just seems so hot between there and here. Which makes me that much more thankful to be on this nice train with free water and a fully functional air conditioning.

I'm a firm believer in alternative narratives. I think it's something that keeps me sane when things don't go how I want them to. I think it's faith paired with a vibrant imagination. I love the verse that says, "And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him." I think it's Romans 8:28, but I could be very wrong. It gives me peace that everything that happens really is for good. In some way. Ugh, as I write that, I am heaing a lot of objections: The Holocaust, genocide in general, child abuse, the list goes on. . . but at the same time, my thoughts about alternative narratives jump in. I guess the idea that in another narrative, it could have gone a different way, and it could have been worse. I picture it like something happend in the wose case scenario, and then someone prayed or called out, "No, God. Not that." And he went back (He doesn't work on a linear timeline) and changed it. I know a couple of you who are probably thinking I'm crazy, but I don't particularly care. It's a thoguht process that works for me. Like with child abuse, the child could have been killed. Maybe someone cried out, "No, I need him. Anything but that, just don't take him away from me." And the story was rewritten. The child was spared. Albeit, spared with emotional and physical scars, but still given the gift of life and the chance to make the world a little better. To show his children love instead of abuse. On a lighter note, there was a party awhile back that I wanted to go to that I ended up not going to. I was bummed for a bit, until I thought about alternative narratives. Maybe it would have been one of those "good nights gone bad" kind of experiences. Maybe it would have ended really, really poorly. Maybe it would have ended with me saying, "God, if only I hadn't have gone to that party." Maybe. And so the story was rewritten. . . Maybe.

Maybe not.

Maybe not, and this is all a bunch of nonesense. But it's nonesense that works for me. Nonesense that keeps me not only sane but cheerful when my purse gets jacked and my train gets delayed. And I know that God works for the good of those who love Him, so I can only believe that there is good in each situation. I just have to look for it.

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UPDATE
The connections didn't work out, so I'm in P-something, France for the night with two other girls that were Barcelona-bound. One is from New Jersey and the other is from Massachusetts. They're pretty cool, and I'm glad to have met them. I'm safe, happy, about to be fed (we'll go foraging for food soon), and staying in a HOTEL which is a huge upgrade from hostels, so that's fun. Tomorrow I will try and find a phone and a camera. Life is good. God is good.

Bye!